


A Million Shades of Blue

by Not Applicable (not_applicable)



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: AUTHOR CHOSE NOT TO USE WARNINGS FOR A REASON OKAY, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, American Beauty spoilers, Epic Friendship, Friends to Lovers, Grief/Mourning, Guilt, Heavy Angst, Interracial Relationship, Let Go and Let God, M/M, Missing Persons, Pepper Feels, Protective Rhodey, Put out the torches. Hide the moon. Hide the stars., Rhodey Feels, Rhodey Is Actually The Greatest Bro of All Time, Rhodey Is a Good Bro, Survivor Guilt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-11
Updated: 2013-08-11
Packaged: 2017-12-23 02:44:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/921062
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/not_applicable/pseuds/Not%20Applicable
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I just know that if I could get to wherever he is, I could find him.  Dead or alive, I'd bring him back to us.”</p><p>James Rhodes will <i>never</i> stop searching for Tony Stark.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Sir_Thopas](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sir_Thopas/gifts).



> A Tony/Rhodey [prompt fill](http://avengerkink.livejournal.com/17385.html?thread=38140905#t38140905). (This is getting out of hand.)
> 
>  **WARNING** : Heavy angst, lots of grief and mourning and guilt and such. I think you can tell I got my period like the second I posted this.
> 
> ...and look! I didn't write smut! I can't believe it!

Rhodey didn't even feel it anymore when the War Machine went supersonic. He just tightened his fists and checked his trajectory and arrival time while also initiating an uplink to JARVIS. The Department of Defense didn't know that Tony's household AI was accessible through Rhodey's suit, and he liked it that way. Their scientists weren't even able to detect it, let alone do anything about it.

Rhodey was flying over Barbados, the tiny island barely a blur beneath him. He'd be in New York City in an hour if he kept it at Mach 2. The War Machine could handle it. Rhodey thought of the time he and Tony went to Bridgetown for Spring Break and Tony disappeared at a block party, dancing his way into a crowd of sweaty bodies that seemed to pulse around him. Rhodey looked for him for two hours before finding Tony drinking a young coconut on the beach with a boy who was all dark skin and hazel eyes and big hair and a white smile.

JARVIS chimed in suddenly. _“He is gone, sir,”_ JARVIS said.

Rhodey wanted to ask why JARVIS was calling him 'sir' all of a sudden, but then he realized – _gone_ -

“What do you mean, J?”

“ _I regret to inform you that Mr. Stark has flown into an interdimensional portal which has been permanently closed behind him.”_ JARVIS paused. Actually paused, as if to take a breath. _“I can no longer detect his biometrics or locate the Mark 7 armor anywhere on this planet.”_

Rhodey punched it to Mach 4. So maybe JARVIS wasn't having any luck, but Rhodey knew _he_ could find Tony. He was the only one that could, most days.

 

*

 

The War Machine was nearly in pieces when he landed on Tony's disassembly strip. The top floor of the tower was in shambles, wires sparking and parts of the building facade hanging off. Rhodey entered a few commands and War Machine folded open, and he strode out of it towards the battered living room. He heard footsteps and saw Pepper come around the corner from the elevator, her eyes wide and horrified, her steps quick towards him.

“I saw it on the news,” she said, and then she started shaking her head, and now she was covering her face and screaming into her palms, still striding blindly towards him through all the debris, and Rhodey met her halfway in an embrace that didn't have much strength to it. He held her tighter when he felt her scream vibrating in his chest, her throat probably raw already, her little hands in white-knuckled fists and jammed against her mouth.

 

 

Rhodey had waited his entire life to meet Captain America, so he was obviously a bit disappointed in himself when the first thing he did was not reach out for a handshake, but instead aim his fist right at that all-American face.

It was almost as if Cap let it happen. His head jerked to the side and he coughed a bit, but other than that he did nothing in response. He didn't meet Rhodey's eyes when he said it again. “I'm sorry, Colonel.” And then he added, “It had to be done.” Rhodey glanced at Natasha, the spy that had them all fooled last year, and though she met his eyes her gaze was reluctant, shameful. Bruce Banner was just sitting in his chair at the conference table and not speaking, not looking at anyone, his hand in a tight fist on the tabletop. Clint Barton was fiddling with his watch, but his eyes were solemn when he cast a glance in Rhodey's direction. Thor was standing and pacing the floor behind Rhodey, and it should have made him nervous but it didn't. Thor touched Rhodey then, just rested a hand on his shoulder, and his voice should have been booming when he spoke but it wasn't.

“I am sorry for your loss,” he said, gentle as a child's touch. Rhodey shrugged off his hand and walked out of the room.

 

 

Rhodey went back upstairs to Tony's penthouse to find Pepper sweeping the kitchen floor. She'd cleared off the countertops and wiped everything down, rearranged the jars of dry beans and pickled peppers that had been on display. Something was in the oven. She looked up at him and smiled, her eyes red and puffy.

“Just trying to make the place livable again,” she laughed, a hollow sound.

Rhodey got a ladder and began tucking frayed wires back into the ceiling when he heard glass shattering, _smash_ then _smash_ then _smash_ , and he turned to see Pepper launching those same jars across the room, and she was screaming again, but this time there were words. _“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!”_ Rhodey understood why she wasn't able to be any more eloquent than that.

Rhodey walked over and took her by the shoulders, let her sob into his shirt for a while before he walked her to the bedroom, which hadn't received any damage from the battle. Pepper lay on the bed gasping for breath as Rhodey ran a bath for her, and he took off her shoes for her and let her hair down, shook it out for her and whispered, “It's okay, Pep, I'll find him.” He didn't like the way she grinned at that so he left and went to make her a Sidecar, and he went back to the bathroom to find her neck-deep in bubbles with her vacant gaze aimed at _Baraka_.

He took the food out of the oven (enchiladas) and ate a little, then plated some for Pepper before working on his armor for about an hour. He checked in on Pepper again to find that she'd fallen asleep. He nudged her and she stirred without a startle, smiling at him like she was so glad he was there when he handed her a robe and got up to give her privacy. He made her eat one enchilada and then put her to bed with a Gimlet, and he continued working on War Machine. He was determined to have it flight-ready by the morning. He'd work through the night if he had to. He was going to find Tony.

 

*

 

The next day there were piles and piles of flowers at the door of Stark Tower. Left by thankful locals for Tony's sacrifice. There had been a candlelight vigil the night before, and there was another scheduled for that night as well. SHIELD released a statement about what happened, and Rhodey thought that they should have _at least_ credited JARVIS with the quote, “We are no longer able to track the whereabouts of the Iron Man armor on this planet.” Everyone saw what happened. Everyone saw Tony disappear into the sky. The next day, Tony Stark was officially declared dead.

 

 

Rhodey went into Tony's workshop and found pieces of prototype suits – blue gauntlets here or silver boots there. He stayed there for a while, just messing with Tony's tech and doing nothing. Rhodey went to lunch on Tony's guest floor, also untouched by the battle, and Steve said hello though he didn't look in his eyes. Widow said nothing – she picked up her sandwich and left, her face red as she exited. Rhodey ate with the rest of them and hated every second of it. Pepper was there too but she was solemn, just mincing up the matzoh balls in her soup until it looked like stew, and she never took a single bite.

Back in the penthouse, Rhodey lay on the couch with Pepper nodding off on his chest, wind gusting in through the busted-out windows. “I don't know what to do with myself,” she said, her voice lazy with grief. “Tony was my boss and one of my best friends. Who do we...” _Follow_ , Rhodey thought she might continue. Or _take care of_ , which would have been more accurate.

Past tense. She was speaking in past tense. He really fucking hated that.

 

*

 

“ _Sir, your dress uniform has arrived by way of your mother. Due to a lack of space here at Stark Tower, I have arranged accommodations for her at the Waldorf-Astoria.”_

“What? Why is my mom here? My uniform? Why -”

“ _The memorial service for Mr. Stark has been scheduled for ten o'clock tomorrow morning, sir.”_

“Why is there gonna be a service?” Rhodey asked. “And why are you calling me 'sir'? I'm not – I didn't make you, Tony did.” Pepper was on her tablet beside him trying to type something, and she perked up at Rhodey's and JARVIS's conversation.

“ _You wrote 33% of my coding and designed the entirety of my server configuration,_ ” JARVIS explained.  “ _It is for this reason that Mr. Stark has programmed me to regard you as my creator as well._ ”

 

* * *

 

_Rhodey was in a top-secret room in Tony's Malibu mansion, installing rack after rack into so many servers that he'd lost count by now. He then hardwired them together and continued on, knowing this task would last well into the night._

_The next morning, he and Tony were sitting on the couch side by side, each with a glass of champagne._

“ _You ready?” Tony asked him, and Rhodey nodded eagerly. “Alright, here goes...” Tony cleared his throat and smiled into the air, and Rhodey couldn't help but smile, too._

“ _JARVIS?” Tony said aloud, and a smooth English voice responded without a moment's hesitation._

“ _Yes, sir?”_

_Tony leaned over and kissed Rhodey's lips for the first time in fifteen years, then clinked their glasses together. “Our baby,” he whispered, still smiling against Rhodey's mouth._

 

* * *

 

“Okay, well – stop talking like he's gone,” Rhodey said out loud, maybe to JARVIS or to Pepper or probably to those jerks outside holding candles and singing hymns. “I'll find him.” Rhodey felt Pepper's hand on his and he wanted to brush her away, but he wouldn't.

 

*

 

Rhodey did not attend the memorial service.

 

Instead, he called Dr. Jane Foster in Tromsø. Earth was still working on the technology to create and control an Einstein-Rosen Bridge. Rhodey put his head in his hands and cried.

 

*

 

Everyone got back to the tower and congregated on the guest floor, just the team and Pepper and Rhodey. Pepper was remarkably composed and that made Rhodey feel better. Perhaps she'd gotten some closure from the service. People joked lightly and talked about Tony a little bit, but mostly they all sat quietly and admired the things Tony had decorated the place with – jazz records framed on the wall, vintage Captain America tour posters, photos of him and Rhodey on vacation in college. Rhodey picked up a photo of him and Tony in Bridgetown, taken by the gorgeous boy with light eyes and big hair, Rhodey holding Tony's drink and Tony looking right at Rhodey, his smile electric.

“You've known him since college?” Rhodey heard, and he knew it was Cap. Steve was still in his suit, his black tie made of linen, nothing flashy about him today at all. Rhodey nodded. “I wish I could have made a different decision. I really do, Jim. I can't stand that he's not here now because -”

“He's gonna laugh when I tell him about how bummed you got,” Rhodey said, still looking at the photo and remembering the smell of roasted chicken and ocean water in the air that night. Steve didn't respond. He just walked away.

Later, Rhodey went out on the balcony to find Natasha smoking a cigarette. He stood beside her, and even from almost a hundred floors up, they could hear the songs being sung at the vigil below.

“I almost didn't do it,” she said. “I almost told Cap, 'No. He's coming back.'”

 

 

Later that night, Pepper slept while Rhodey sat on the floor of Tony's walk-in closet. He and Tony had gone to see _American Beauty_ in the theatre when it came out, and Tony scolded him when he snickered at Annette Benning's character for sobbing into her dead husband's clothes. Tony's cologne was in the air and the collars of his shirts all smelled like his neck, Rhodey realized, a mix of sweat and shampoo but mostly just skin and hair. Rhodey had one of Tony's new gauntlets on, and he could see that it was made to fit Tony's hand perfectly. The fingers were thinner and shorter than Rhodey's but he forced it on anyway, just to feel it wrapped around his skin, covering him.

He wanted to apologize to Tony for laughing at that scene in _American Beauty_. It was immature of him and not nice at all. It was a very serious moment and he should have been paying attention.

 

He went back to the bedroom and Pepper sat up when he slid under the covers. He couldn't see her face in the dark and he was glad for that.

“Rhodey, you okay?” she asked. She didn't wait for an answer before rolling to him and holding him tight, whispering things to him, being strong for him when he felt so weak.

 

*

 

A few days later Rhodey met up with one of his old buddies from MIT, now an astrophysics professor at NYU. He also said that humanity had yet to be able to create and control an Einstein-Rosen Bridge.

Rhodey thought about putting on the War Machine and nailing it at Mach 5, then just flying until the fucking thing ripped itself apart. Maybe if he went fast enough...

 

 

He had lunch with his mother. She talked to him about his father's death, about the way she slept with pillows piled beside her for months and months, attempting to recreate the feel of him, the warmth of him. She held her son's hand and listened to him, listened to rambling stories about the trip to Barbados and his first time seeing Tony suit up and become Iron Man. They went to the park and his mother insisted on saying a prayer for him. “Pray for Tony, too,” Rhodey said, and his heart sank at the look his words brought to his mother's face.

“Oh, Jim,” she said. “There's nothing we can do for him here on this earth anymore. It's time to let go and let God.”

 

 

Rhodey went back to the tower and sat on the floor of Tony's closet. Someone was cooking something nearby. He could smell fire-roasted meat all around him.

 

* * *

 

“ _You were gone for two hours, Tony!”_

“ _So? I was hangin' with...you know, the guy. Mr. Big Hair.”_

“ _Tony, you're a tourist here and you look like you bleed money,” he said, and Tony rolled his eyes at that. “You don't know that guy, you don't know what he could be up to. It's not safe.”_

“ _Come on, he was nice enough -”_

“ _Don't wander off, okay? I mean if you want Mr. Big Hair then I'm sure he'll be around, the festival lasts all week. Just don't disappear like that on me again.”_

_Tony's lips curved into a grin that made Rhodey's face hot. “Oh, I see.”_

“ _Shut up.” Rhodey couldn't help the smile that tugged at his lips. Tony approached and Rhodey thought of resisting, thought of moving away when Tony wanted so much but just couldn't seem to give the same things back in return. But he didn't – he wrapped an arm around Tony's shoulders and they met in a kiss, carnival drums outside beating a rhythm that Rhodey could feel in his chest._

“ _You're right,” Tony said. “We're only here for a few more days. It'll be just you and me from now on, I promise.”_

“ _I promise,” Tony said again later that night, his hips bucking back at Rhodey, who leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss between Tony's shoulderblades._

_Tony said that a lot but rarely ever followed through, so Rhodey was surprised when Tony didn't wander off again for the rest of their stay in Bridgetown._

_Still, when they got back to the states, they broke up. For the third time._

 

* * *

 

Rhodey finally got War Machine back in good shape on the day that Tony's will was read. He left everything related to the company to Pepper – everything – as well as Stark Tower, one of his jets, and one billion dollars. She barely seemed to hear Tony's lawyer when he read it to them, just nodded and gripped Rhodey's hand tighter. Happy was given most of Tony's cars, all of his North American vacation homes, another one of his jets, four yachts, one billion dollars, and a horse named Pepper Jr. Tony left Rhodey everything else. Everything. All of his tech, all of his stock in Stark Industries, his home in Malibu, the rest of his cars and yachts, the rest of his vacation homes _all over the world_ , his personal jet, three private islands, a ranch in Montana, hundreds of square miles of undeveloped land, all of his savings that weren't to be donated to charity, his parents' wedding rings, and more. Happy and Pepper actually blinked and shared a look, flabbergasted.

“Hm,” Tony's lawyer hummed quietly. “Seems he really wanted to look after you.”

 

*

 

Rhodey heard the gentle click of Pepper's high heels as she entered. She'd gone to a meeting today, her first attempt to return to work in three weeks. He heard her drop her keys and her purse and mail, and she walked over to him to drop a letter in his lap.

“Something from the Air Force,” she said. Rhodey put down his tablet and picked up the envelope, opening it – it was just a confirmation of his extended leave. Six more weeks off.

Pepper sat down as Rhodey picked up his tablet again. He was reading a paper by Dr. Erik Selvig. Wormhole theory. Pepper peeked at the screen and then at his face, and he didn't look at her in return.

“Rhodey,” she said gently. “Ever heard of 'letting go and letting God'?”

 

*

 

Rhodey's mother began to call several times a day. Always checking in on him, asking if he was okay. Conversation in the tower got stilted and strange towards him, he felt, and Rhodey knew he had a reason to be suspicious when Pepper kept mentioning her therapist and how great she was. One night Rhodey picked up his tablet to find a business card lying on it – Pepper's therapist, located in Yonkers.

It was clear to Rhodey now that everyone thought he was going insane with grief. Every night Rhodey watched the sky, watched for any sign of red and gold against the horizon. He read scientific papers that all ended the same way (humanity has yet to harness the power of the Einstein-Rosen Bridge). He had to let go and let God.

 

Or rather, _a_ god.


	2. Chapter 2

Rhodey accessed Tony's private servers and examined the specs of the Mark 7. Tony had made that suit by himself and it was a prototype, so no one really knew what it was capable of. Seems he'd made it's hull airtight and pressurized the interior, and it had a twelve hour oxygen reservoir, food stores, and a water filtration system. The Mark 7 had been worthy of space flight.

“He had twelve hours of oxygen, Pepper, who knows what -”

“Rhodey, even if he survived, what can we do?” she asked, and her face was starting to resemble his mother's. “We don't even know where that portal opened up to. It's been a month.”

Rhodey glanced around to see the team lazying around, and no one was looking at him. On purpose. He went outside and stood on the disassembly strip, and he could hear them whispering behind him. He found Natasha's pack of smokes and he lit one up, his face burning as he sucked it down. He turned to face the living room, where Dr. Banner was nodding as Pepper spoke, one hand to her forehead as she wobbled her head back and forth, exasperated. He could barely hear her, just mumblings of “my therapist” and “won't go” and “I worry” and “a long history together” and “complicated dynamic.” Thor was looking at him now, staring at him quite purposefully though he was clearly listening to Pepper.

Rhodey flicked the cigarette away. It was going to make him sick, he knew it.

“I was not aware of your history with Mr. Stark.”

Rhodey felt like he'd just been looking at Thor sitting on the couch when his voice was suddenly right behind him, and he turned around sharply. Thor was in civilian clothes and holding two drinks, and Rhodey took the dark one – he could smell the Martin Mills, Tony's top shelf bourbon.

“It's not a big deal,” Rhodey said. “We dated for a bit in college. Stayed friends.”

 

* * *

 

  _Rhodey tried not to hover as Tony exited the bathroom and walked to the little bed in Rhodey's quarters. Tony was still exhausted from the heat and the sun and they'd opted to wait until tomorrow to debrief him and give him a more thorough medical exam. Tonight he'd be on base and staying in Rhodey's room, the only one that had it's own toilet and shower attached._

_Tony sat on the bed with a grunt. Rhodey was sure his entire body hurt. He had a towel around his waist and the thing glowing in his chest didn't seem to have been effected by the shower. Rhodey sat down beside him and looked at it, Tony remarkably calm beneath his gaze (he'd yelled at the doctors who'd tried to examine it earlier)._

“ _It glows like the arc reactor at your factory,” Rhodey said. “Same shade of blue and everything.”_

“ _That's what it is,” Tony replied. “A miniaturized version. It powers an electromagnet that keeps shrapnel from entering my heart and killing me.” Rhodey looked at Tony's face. “It had been hooked up to a car battery before.”_

_Rhodey's jaw worked like he was going to speak but he didn't say anything, just reached out for Tony's hands and kissed them, pressed them to his face and felt their heat. “I never stopped looking for you,” he said, and he had Tony in his lap then, his towel falling to the floor and his hands pressing him back onto the rickety bed._

“ _I knew you'd find me,” Tony mumbled into Rhodey's mouth as he pulled at his clothes. “You're the only one who_ can _.”_

_They last kissed on the day that JARVIS first came online, and what they were about to do had last happened between them decades earlier, but Tony was here now and he was peeling away Rhodey's clothes, throwing them to the ground and gazing at his nude body like it was something awesome to behold. Tony was all lips and hands and eyes that streamed tears as he wrapped his legs tight around Rhodey's waist, repeating the words, “You found me,” over and over into the crook of Rhodey's neck._

“ _I love you so much,” Rhodey moaned, his eyes shut tight. “I'll always find you, Tony, I promise...”_

 

* * *

 

“Then you must care greatly for him,” Thor said.

“I know you all think I'm going crazy,” Rhodey said, ignoring Thor's innocent little blink. “Pepper's trying to get me into therapy and I think she might have even snuck a Wellbutrin into my coffee the other day, too. I just...I always find him, okay? When no one else can find him, _I always can_. It's like a thing between us – I've got Stark Radar, he always says.”

Present tense. We speak in present tense when we talk about Tony.

“I can't get to him from here,” Rhodey continued, looking into his drink. “There aren't any Einstein-Rosen Bridges around here for me to use, ya know?” He recognized the glass he was drinking from. It was from a set that he'd bought for Tony in Instanbul fifteen years ago. “I just know that if I could get to wherever he is, I could find him. Dead or alive, I'd bring him back to us.”

Rhodey realized that this was the first time he'd admitted that Tony could possibly be dead. He turned and vomited into a potted plant, his vision starting to blur as Thor's giant hand rubbed big circles along his back.

 

Rhodey woke up on the couch in Tony's living room. The lights were low and he was fully dressed, as if someone had placed him there, and he was sure it had been Thor. He could hear voices, Pepper talking to the team again about him. More stuff about “history” and “those two have been at it for decades now” and “ _of course_ this is hard for him” and “they're still mad for each other.” And “Rhodey won't stop” and “he never does” and “he always finds him.”

 

*

 

“You mentioned the Einstein-Rosen Bridge,” Thor said from the foot of the couch. Rhodey had slept there that night, didn't move from where Thor had placed him after he vomited and passed out on the strip the night before. “In Asgard we call it the Bifrost, and I will be traveling it's path tomorrow to deliver my brother to justice.”

Rhodey sat up a bit. He really hoped that he was right about where he thought Thor was going with this.

“I do not have the gift of sight,” Thor said simply. “But I know one who does. Heimdall sees all living things, and if Stark lives, Heimdall will know.” Thor stood then. “We leave from the roof in the morning. Dress comfortably and bring all you might need with you.”

“I will,” Rhodey said, nodding quickly the way a child would. “Thank you, god.”

Thor smiled big and bright at that, and he pressed a comforting hand on Rhodey's shoulder before exiting the room. Rhodey realized that Thor had not asked him if he wanted to go, had just told him when and where and how to prepare for the trip. There was no question of it. Rhodey would search high and low for Tony, he'd search heaven and earth and the moon and every single star for him. He'd search as long as he needed to, and he'd only stop when he was dead.

Rhodey went to Target and bought a vacuum sealer, then went to Tony's favorite barbecue restaurant and got a rack of ribs. He sealed them up in a bag and did the same with some green bean casserole and four of Pepper's enchiladas, which she'd taken to making once a week now. According to the specs, the Mark 7's food stores consisted of tubes of protein paste and nutrient bars. He also got Tony's MIT flask that he kept on display in his bedroom and filled it to the top with twenty-four year-old Martin Mills whiskey.

 

*

 

Pepper cried when she hugged Rhodey goodbye. She was sobbing as if she'd never see him again, Happy holding onto her shoulders as Rhodey squeezed her waist. He knew she needed him to be there for her, but he couldn't miss the opportunity that Thor was giving him. The team and Happy would take care of her and each other in his absence, but he was still so worried about them all.

“I hope this works,” Cap said as he shook Rhodey's hand. “I really do.”

“It will,” Rhodey said, bringing his other hand up to pat Steve on the shoulder.

Thor stood with the Tesseract in one hand and Loki holding it's other end, Loki gagged and scowling. Rhodey pressed a hand on Thor's shoulder and Thor did the same, and they both nodded to their friends before being consumed by a breathtaking light that seemed to be composed of a million shades of blue, and then they were gone.

 

*

 

Asgard was like a painting come to life. The light glowed gold and the sky was not blue, not _really_ , and just trying to figure out what color it actually _was_ was giving Rhodey a bit of a headache. He counted the minutes while Thor delivered Loki to Frigga and Odin, and after that was taken care of he was taken to greet the two sorta-deities himself. He followed the lead of Sif and the Warriors Three, nodding and bowing modestly, and Frigga had him approach her throne. This woman had a gentle smile and smelled like gold, smelled the way the light would if it had a scent, and she placed cool hands on his hair and whispered into his forehead, “Do not let your heart be troubled. I offer you my blessing, James Rhodes. Your path will be lighted and your journey will be safe.”

 

He and Thor walked down the rainbow bridge towards Heimdall's post together.  Rhodey was now clad in the modest but Asgard-appropriate garb of animal hide tights and boots, a sword on his hip, but he was still wearing his 1988 MIT Department of Robotic Engineering t-shirt.

“Are you sure you do not want a cloak?” Thor said. “We do not know where we could be going. _If_ we are going anywhere.”

“I'm fine,” Rhodey said. “Tony will laugh when he sees it.”

“You are quite confident that you will find him.”

“I always find him,” Rhodey said, and he saw the door of the shining observatory slide open to show a golden-eyed man magnificently armored and standing before them. “He says I'm the only one who can.”

They entered and Rhodey immediately went to speak, but he stopped when Heimdall slowly lifted a hand. “Be comforted, Rhodes,” he said. “Right now, he rests upon a white sand shore. His belly is full and he is sleeping. He is safe.” Sometimes it was easy to forget that Rhodey was now in the presence of gods.

Present tense. Heimdall was speaking in present tense.

 

*

 

Rhodey told Thor that he wanted to go alone, and Thor did not protest at all. He understood. Thor handed Rhodey a small beacon, a bullet-shaped thing that shone silver like the Mark 2, and he gave him instructions on how to activate it. Once he found Tony he could turn on that beacon and Heimdall would be alerted, and he would send Thor to retrieve them.

Rhodey's feet were shaky when he landed on the soft grass. He was up on a hill in thick woods and the ground beneath him smoked from the Bifrost's touch. Tony was supposed to be on the beach below, about half a mile away. Rhodey pulled his rucksack up onto his shoulders and started down the hill, and he remembered hiking through forests in Brazil with Tony, setting up camps at night, making little lean-tos out of branches and elephant ears and falling asleep with the wind kissing his skin and Tony kissing his lips. The vegetation wasn't unlike an earthly rain forest and he felt glad that Tony had somehow ended up here. He hoped it felt familiar to Tony. He hoped he thought of that hiking trip, too, and that the thought was comforting.

The sun was setting by the time Rhodey reached the sand, and he looked into the sky to see three moons – one was just a small speck of light, the other was far away and ringed, and one was quite close, cratered and off to the right, half-covered by the horizon. He looked down and saw that a fire had been lit on the shore – a sign of life that made Rhodey want to start yelling and running, but he didn't know what the past month had been like for Tony and he didn't want to startle him. The camp seemed to be a mile away though it was only a few hundred feet, and the beach he walked on was already doused in darkness – this planet moved fast. His boots kicked up sand as he kept his pace quick, his heart thumping, his face starting to sweat in the cool and sweet-smelling air of a place he'd never been to before. He barely noticed the fact that he was on an alien planet when he could see a figure by the fire, shirtless and shoeless and just staring into the flames, and suddenly the figure looked up sharply. He'd heard Rhodey's footsteps but apparently still couldn't see him, so he stood, and Rhodey's heart skipped a beat at the bright blue glow in the center of the figure's chest.

“Who's there?” Tony called, walking around the fire quickly, towards the noise. “Thor?”

“Try again,” Rhodey called out, and he heard Tony gasp and saw him stop dead in his tracks. Rhodey was almost running now but Tony was just standing there, his hands out in front of him with fingers groping uselessly at the air, his chest heaving, his eyes wide.

“Rhodey.”

Tony ran out of the light and into the darkness to him, and they crashed together in a bone-breaking hug before Tony pulled back and looked at him. Tony was thinner but not much so, and his muscles were still taut and exercised. He had a full beard that looked surprisingly handsome on him, and his hair was brushing his neck. The reactor shone bright in his chest still and his skin was clean. He smelled like the sun and like ocean water and there was fruit on his breath.

“Rhodey,” he said again, and he wrapped his arms around Rhodey's shoulders and kissed him, mouth closed but his eyes open, staring into wide and watery eyes. He broke the kiss and hugged Rhodey again, pulling him down to the sand. “I knew you'd be the one to find me.”


	3. Chapter 3

_Tony felt himself being pulled backwards at breakneck speed, and suddenly he stopped with a horrible jolt, a jolt so horrible that it knocked him out cold._

_He woke up an hour later still floating in the abyss. He was surrounded by the exploded debris of the Chitauri mothership, wiring and body parts and dishes and bomb fragments whirring past, dinging up his armor. He figured he should get out of the explosion's debri field so he fired up his boosters and moved a distance away, where the debris was a lot thinner._

_He turned on his distress signal and then looked around. There were planets nearby, one of them thankfully blocking him from the burning heat of a nearby star, his suit gratefully providing climate control against the absolute zero of space. The planets looked close to him but he knew they were actually weeks away, even at Mach 5, the fastest this suit could go._

_He didn't bother trying to talk to JARVIS. He looked around at the planet nearby. There was a pale blue ocean and green swathes of trees across it's continents. Maybe there were people there. Someone, anyone. He fired up his boosters and started traveling towards the rock._

_Three hours later he felt he was no closer, and he looked to see that he only had eight hours of oxygen left. His stomach felt funny and he wished he had someone to talk to. “JARVIS,” he said, and immediately he felt stupid._

_There was nothing around him. Just space junk whizzing by frightfully close. It was deathly quiet. He thought of turning on music but his radio worked through an uplink to his music library at home. There could be no music._

_An hour later, Tony was starting to sweat inside the suit. He was going to suffocate in his armor in seven hours. He couldn't reach anything that could save his life in that amount of time. He thought of that failed phone call to Pepper and his conversation with Rhodey before he grabbed onto that fucking nuke. He'd told Rhodey to stay in South America, not to worry about it, but still he just responded with, “I'll be there in an hour.” He thought of the last human voice he heard, Cap telling him, “You know that's a one-way ticket, Stark.” He remembered the sound of JARVIS, “Powering down, sir.”_

_An hour later, Tony saw a little shuttle floating by, not traveling too fast at all, actually. He immediately fired over to it and found the hatch, and he was easily able to jimmy his way inside of it. It was a Chitauri scoutship and he knew the crew would all be dead, and he didn't know why but that made him horribly sad. He pressurized the airlock and entered the ship, and sure enough there were dead cyborg lobstermen all around him, guns still in their hands, walkie-talkies and alien clipboards and what-have-you. He was able to take off his faceplate then, gratefully breathing non-recycled air for the first time since he put the suit on back at his place. He walked up to the cockpit and shoved the dead pilot away, and he pulled a wire out of his suit and hooked it into a port on the Chitauri ship. The interfaces didn't work together at all but he was able to eventually figure out the controls, and it turns out the ship was barely worthy of flight, basically drifting in the opposite direction of the planet below. The Chitauri breathed oxygen like humans did so he hoped that fucking place was habitable or even had people on it. People that could get him back to Earth, or at the very least, take him in and help him make a home._

_Tony had no idea where he was. He tried not to panic._

_He was able to direct the ship's drift towards the planet before him, and he used plain old pen and paper to determine that it would take him a week to get there. He spent those days walking around the ship and learning it's systems, finding the oxygen stores and replenishing the ones in his suit, preparing canisters that he could take with him when he would eventually have to leave this thing. He found food but most of it seemed unfit for human consumption except for a very sweet sort of tack, but luckily there was plenty of water._

_After three days, the biological components of the cyborgs began to decay. Five days and they were starting to leak, running down towards the airlock door like a disgusting river. Tony pushed all of their bodies into the airlock and said a prayer, then jettisoned them all out into space. He cleaned up the smears on the floor with the rags of their uniforms, and he caught himself crying but didn't stop. They had been dead the entire time, but still. Tony was really alone now. There was no one. Literally no one to look at, to smile at, to talk to or fall asleep with._

_Two days later, Tony suited up and packed his suit full of all the oxygen and water he could, and he even restocked his food stores with the weird Chitauri shortbread he'd found. The little shuttle entered the atmosphere at terminal velocity, and immediately Tony could see and hear the hull catching fire from re-entry. He used his repulsors to blow open the hatch door and he bailed at 2,000 feet, watching as the flaming shuttle splashed down into an ocean. Tony's only mode of transportation off of this planet was destroyed now. Tony had no idea where he was._

_He flew over to a nearby beach and landed on soft white sand. The HUD told him that the air was breathable, and he stuck a hand in the water to find that the ocean was actually fresh (and potable) water. The temperature outside was 78 degrees Fahrenheit. There_ had to be _living things on this planet. There had to be primates, or maybe even people._

_Tony removed his helmet and the air smelled clean and salty even though the water was fresh. He could see vegetation nearby. Maybe there was edible food. He could see fish in the water._

 

*

 

_Two days passed. Tony put on his suit and flew a total of twenty miles that day, and he found nothing. He flew straight up into the air then and looked down on the map of the planet below him, and near him he could see no cities, no towns, no villages, no tribes, not even one fucking person. He went into the woods and found fruit, and he knew he would have to use his wits to figure out how to fish. He still had his distress signal going, just in case._

_*  
_

 

_A week passed and Tony had finally constructed a lean-to that would stay up through the night. He remembered hiking with Rhodey in Brazil and sleeping on the beach with him, drinking Cachaça straight and making love until the sun rose. Their lean-to was always designed this way, two sticks and one side that sloped all the way to the ground, and it provided enough cover while giving them a gorgeous view of the beach and the horizon before them._

_Tony sat by the fire and roasted what he hoped was a banana, remembering ordering Bananas Foster all the time at Spago because Rhodey would get_ so _embarrassed by the way the waiter would prepare it for them at the table. And he'd plate it beautifully and put two spoons in it, and then the waiter would say, “Gentlemen, enjoy.”_

 

*

 

_One day Tony found coconut trees, real Earth-style coconut trees, and he burst into tears. Something to remind him of home._

_The same day, he figured out how to fish with a spear. He mastered it quickly and feasted on strange pink-fleshed things that were flaky and sweet like mahi-mahi when roasted over a fire. He drank coconut water and thought about the time Rhodey got pissed at him in Barbados for disappearing to flirt with some busboy. Rhodey dumped him when they got home from that trip, but Tony figured he deserved it. That was pretty rude. They were on vacation together, as a couple._

_Tony laughed to himself. He and Rhodey broke up two more times before finally giving up when Tony was 22. Rhodey was getting serious about his career in the Air Force by then and he needed to shift his focus anyway. Tony made him the official military liaison to Stark Industries – “a gift for putting up with eight years of my shit” – but the truth was that Rhodey was perfect for the job. They both moved on after that, but Tony always asked himself how he fucked that one up so bad._

_He wondered what happened when Rhodey got to New York. He wondered how Pepper and Happy were._

 

*

 

_Two weeks and Tony was hiking in the woods now, searching for more flora and gathering up what he thought he could eat. He used his suit's urine filtration system to purify water for himself but he expected the fruit to make him sick, but it never did. He didn't understand. Why were there only fish on this planet? Where were all the people?_

 

*

 

_He knew he'd been declared dead by now. He knew his will had been read. He was confident in his decision to leave his family's legacy in Pepper's hands, and he hoped she'd at least adopt a kid one day and train them up, pass it down. He knew Happy would be glad to receive whatever he'd been given and he knew that Rhodey wouldn't care at all. Tony had secretly revised his will after he got back from Afghanistan and got rid of Stane, making sure that the most important people in his life would be okay after he was gone. He gave Rhodey everything. He'd always wanted to give Rhodey everything, anyway._

_*  
_

 

_Three weeks and Tony thought about The Avengers. He thought of quiet Bruce and hoped he was still in New York and still surrounded by friends. He hoped the same for Barton, one that he unfortunately had never gotten to know very well. He hoped that Steve and Natasha were okay, that they weren't beating themselves up over this. He was mad at first – if only they'd left it open for just one more fucking second – but he couldn't blame Cap. It had to be done, and Tony had made a choice. He thought of Thor and suddenly became hopeful – Thor could travel between the Nine Realms, and maybe he had a way to find him. He desperately hoped that the team had thought of this by now, but by the end of the night he was writing out equations in the sand and crying, thinking of his mother and his father and wishing he could see that old bastard one more time._

 

*

 

_Tony dreamed of the Avengers and Pepper and Happy and his parents and Rhodey. He dreamed of Rhodey all the time._

_*  
_

 

_A month and Tony didn't think it was a good idea to hold on to hope. He had water and food and he did yoga and kung fu on the beach every morning, went running, and every now and then he'd put on the suit and set out in a new direction but he never found anything. Not even any birds or mammals. There was no technology here. Tony thought of those days he spent wandering across a desert, the nights getting so cold that he thought he'd freeze to death, and one day in the dizzying heat of the sun he just accepted it, just told himself, 'okay world, fuck you, too, eat me alive, let me die now please,' and then he saw helicopters whizzing over his head. And then there was Rhodey in front of him, and Rhodey stayed beside him, all the way to the base, and then Rhodey was inside of him, letting Tony cry and saying that he loved him, still after all this time._

_Tony desperately wanted to go home, but he knew he couldn't. This was it. This was forever. He looked up into the sky and was thankful that it was blue, even though it had three moons in it. Reminded him a little of home, of hiking and sleeping on the beach, of not being alone. Tony napped in the middle of the day, the crashing of the waves near him sounding loud and harsh, almost like a storm._

_He woke at sunset and made a fire, the wind rustling the trees around, and he sat and stared into the flames as night came quickly. He heard more rustling and thought of putting his shirt back on in case there was a storm coming, but then he recognized it: those were footsteps. Specifically, the foot falls of a biped. Tony immediately thought of Rhodey but this was an alien planet, and only one person could find him if he were lost in the Nine Realms, and that was Thor. Tony stood and stepped around the fire, and he asked, “Who's there? Thor?”_

“ _Try again,” he heard, and he froze. This was an_ alien planet _, not Barbados or the MIT science library or even Afghanistan. Still, Tony knew that he shouldn't have been surprised. If anyone was going to find him, he knew who that would be._

“ _Rhodey.”_

 

* * *

 

Tony told him all of this around mouthfuls of ribs and green beans and enchiladas. They were under the lean-to, lying on a bed of elephant ears and eating it all with their hands while Tony spoke, his tone heavy but his eyes bright, and Rhodey knew why – because they both knew how this horrible story would end.

“I thought I was dreaming,” Tony said, lying back with Rhodey on his elbow over him. “I dream of you all the time anyway and I just thought, 'oh god, here it comes, I'm finally coming unglued,' but then I heard your voice, and then you walked up to me and I fucking _touched you_...” Tony leaned up and kissed Rhodey passionately, hungrily, their mouths still smoky from his first taste of earthly food in 38 days. “You found me,” Tony breathed. “Of course you did.”

 

 

Rhodey turned on the beacon Thor gave him and placed it in the sand. He reached into his rucksack and pulled out the flask, and when he showed it to Tony he was literally bowled over by hugs and kisses, Tony speaking into his mouth: “You are the greatest you are the best best _best man I have ever known_ I will love you _forever_ Rhodey do you fucking _hear me?”_

 

*

 

Thor arrived to find Tony suited up and Rhodey with his rucksack on. They'd taken down Tony's camp and used a knife to cut _T.S. + J.R._ into one of the coconut trees Tony had found. “Does that mean we own this planet now?” Tony had asked, and Rhodey smiled and said, “I wouldn't mind adding it to my collection of vacation homes _at all_.”

Thor hugged Tony and smiled with a heartbreaking sincerity, and he took them both by the shoulder as they mimicked the touch. Tony smiled at Rhodey as they were enveloped by a million shades of blue, and then they were gone.

 

*

 

Tony's disassembly strip sizzled beneath them and Rhodey immediately stepped away to let the machines disassemble the Mark 7 from around Tony. Pepper must have heard the noise because she came bursting through the doors in her robe and holding her toothbrush – Heimdall told Rhodey that she'd been sleeping in the living room ever since Rhodey left, that way she never had to take her eyes off of the strip. She had been waiting for their return.

She fell into Tony's arms and completely ignored his beard and the loss of weight, and Rhodey just continued to walk into the house and put his rucksack on the kitchen counter. The others began to emerge from the elevators and stairwells, and they all hugged Rhodey and patted his shoulders as they continued on their way to meet Tony. Steve stopped and shook Rhodey's hand, his eyes full of emotion when he said, “Great work, Colonel.”

 

Rhodey went to rest off the trip and was surprised when Tony joined him an hour later, sliding into bed and grazing his beard along Rhodey's neck.

“I thought you'd wanna stay up,” Rhodey mumbled, genuinely exhausted. “Catch up with everyone.”

“Later,” Tony said. “I wanna rest with you for a while.” He kissed Rhodey's neck and it made him smile. “I'm going to keep you this time. I'm not losing you again, okay? I mean I _obviously_ belong to you but now you belong to me, too.”

 

*

 

Once they announced Tony's return and the press got wind of the story of his rescue, people began to call for Rhodey to receive the Medal of Honor. He wasn't sure he qualified for that, but he was humbled nonetheless. It turned out that in the court of public opinion, literally _no one on earth_ had thought Rhodey would be able to bring Tony back except for Virginia Potts and Harold Hogan, but his feelings weren't hurt by that. He never doubted it for a minute, but no one out there knew their history, and no one knew that Rhodey always found Tony _no matter what_. No one knew that Rhodey would search forever for Tony if he had to, across all Nine Realms and into the blackness beyond if that's what it took.


End file.
